I can never give my husband a hard time for eating dog food (he thought it was corned beef hash) in a drunken state again.  I may not have eaten something disgusting, but I did something just as bad.  Amber was in the hospital for a few hours the other day due to minor baby issues and I went to use the hand sanitizer that is provided by the hospital on the wall.  Low and behold it was empty.  Instead of doing the normal thing and just simply washing my hands, I used the small bottle of hand sanitizer that was sitting on the bedside table.  For some reason I couldn’t get that huge dab of sanitizer to soak into my skin no matter how hard I tried.  I must have rubbed my hands together for several minutes before it donned on me that it wasn’t hand sanitizer.  It was lubricant for “checking” pregnant (or non-pregnant) women.  That was kind of a shocker, but made us both laugh.

Trying to rub lubricant into my hands isn’t the worst thing I have ever done though.  Do you ever wake up in the middle of the night and just have an icky taste in your mouth that won’t go away?  Usually a bit of mouthwash or some toothpaste will make the taste better.  Last time I did this it wasn’t toothpaste I smeared on my finger and rubbed on my teeth, but Neosporin. Talk about a jolt at 3 am.    This was almost as bad as the time I thought I was spraying hair spray on my freshly-dried locks and it turned out to be Lysol instead.

It’s good to be back and have a little laughter after all that has happened lately.

Help me!